INTO THE FAIRYLAND OF NOWNESS
𝗜 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗱 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗦𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗮 - 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗲𝗹𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗽𝗶𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻
I discovered this shelter when I had my daily walk in the woods. Since when I watched Anne with an e, I have always been longing for a place like this, a hiding place in the forest where I can stay just to read and write. Though, this shelter were only staying in my fantasy, I didn't think I could build by myself and neither did I expect someone would build it.
For the past 4 months, in this lockdown, I have been pondering a lot about life, about existentialism, about living in the moment and all that. These thoughts were simply kindled by the book I read, the movie I watched and the song I listened to lately. Right at the moment I found this wonderful shelter, I sparked with the idea of visualizing what have been going on my mind recently ( well, in a presentable way). For sure , taking a walk in nature leads me to serendipity and creativity.
𝗔 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲
' You are young and life is long, and there is time to kill today and then one day you find ten years have got behind you, no one tell you when to run and you missed the starting gun.'
' You are young and life is long, and there is time to kill today and then one day you find ten years have got behind you, no one tell you when to run and you missed the starting gun.'
We can never rewind the time, we can never get back to lost opportunities, lost possibilities, that’s part of what it means to be alive in this real world. Time goes by and slips away. When we were younger we didn’t feel that much of its weight. I listened to Pink Floyd about 2 years ago and since then this song has been playing as a voice in the back of my head. It reminds me to live life to the fullest. One day, when my breath is shorter and myself is closer to the land of nothingness, I relisten to this song and I will not regret the life that I have lived!
“𝗧𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗹𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲. 𝗜𝘁’𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗶𝘁.” – 𝗠𝗮𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗺 𝗙𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘁, 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗧𝗩 𝘀𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝗔𝗻𝗻𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝗻 𝗲
I want to arrange my thoughts, I note all the messy thoughts down. I want to express my melancholy without bothering anyone, I cry out to my journal. I want to get away from mundane present, I write about the future fantasy. It occurs to me that I only write diary when I feel confused, uncertain, sad and disconnected from life. Now, I learn to write to remember my life. I write how joyful and blessed I were when I found this wonderful shelter built by someone in the woods, how the sky was not as blue as the day before, how good I felt when one day I randomly woke up early with full energy...I want to remember it all, every detail.
I want to arrange my thoughts, I note all the messy thoughts down. I want to express my melancholy without bothering anyone, I cry out to my journal. I want to get away from mundane present, I write about the future fantasy. It occurs to me that I only write diary when I feel confused, uncertain, sad and disconnected from life. Now, I learn to write to remember my life. I write how joyful and blessed I were when I found this wonderful shelter built by someone in the woods, how the sky was not as blue as the day before, how good I felt when one day I randomly woke up early with full energy...I want to remember it all, every detail.
𝗙𝗲𝗲𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵, 𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗹𝗲𝗱𝗴𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴
I wasn't so into the idea of meditation at first since I thought I could not just sit and did not think about anything at all. Every time whenever I closed my eyes, I had worries or fantasies to think of. I got distracted very easily.
I wasn't so into the idea of meditation at first since I thought I could not just sit and did not think about anything at all. Every time whenever I closed my eyes, I had worries or fantasies to think of. I got distracted very easily.
When I finished watching the movie Soul, for whatever reason, I took a deep breath and felt so good that I could breathe!!! I thought to myself, maybe I could try meditation again tomorrow morning and focus on the good feeling of being able to breathe. I tried and since then I have been practicing meditation every morning after waking up.
Inhale. Exhale. That moment of feeling the air in my lungs is so magically powerful. I notice my lungs expand with each in-breath and condense with each out-breath. I acknowledge my existence, I feel that my soul does not wander around, it is here with my body. I couldn't feel more grateful that this is another day of my life. Every breath feels so alive!
Inhale. Exhale. That moment of feeling the air in my lungs is so magically powerful. I notice my lungs expand with each in-breath and condense with each out-breath. I acknowledge my existence, I feel that my soul does not wander around, it is here with my body. I couldn't feel more grateful that this is another day of my life. Every breath feels so alive!
𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲
I am the artist of my own life, or in other word, existentialist. I have blank papers, I have pens, pencils, colors, paintbrushes, I will create my own artworks. I am experimenting. I am exploring. I have control over my choices and actions. I am not seeking for the meaning of life, I am creating my own meaning.
I am the artist of my own life, or in other word, existentialist. I have blank papers, I have pens, pencils, colors, paintbrushes, I will create my own artworks. I am experimenting. I am exploring. I have control over my choices and actions. I am not seeking for the meaning of life, I am creating my own meaning.
𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝗿𝘆𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝗳 𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀
Fun, loving, delightful or sorrowful, melancholic events...Never do I want to let them fade away to the land of oblivion. They made me who I have become today. They are all in my memory pocket. However, I don't want to live in my memory pocket. I don't want to die in a relative way while I'm still alive. I don't want a part of me to become a living ghost.
Planning the future, setting goals motivate me to move forward. However, how can I be 100 percent sure that it is going to happen as the way I planned? Or, maybe, when I achieve it eventually, will it be as half wonderful as the way I fantasized? Now, I don't want to live in the land of future fantasy anymore, I don't want to be a lost soul who wanders around with the feet never on the ground.
I don't want to live in the past nor in the future, I want to live in the fairyland of nowness.
Fun, loving, delightful or sorrowful, melancholic events...Never do I want to let them fade away to the land of oblivion. They made me who I have become today. They are all in my memory pocket. However, I don't want to live in my memory pocket. I don't want to die in a relative way while I'm still alive. I don't want a part of me to become a living ghost.
Planning the future, setting goals motivate me to move forward. However, how can I be 100 percent sure that it is going to happen as the way I planned? Or, maybe, when I achieve it eventually, will it be as half wonderful as the way I fantasized? Now, I don't want to live in the land of future fantasy anymore, I don't want to be a lost soul who wanders around with the feet never on the ground.
I don't want to live in the past nor in the future, I want to live in the fairyland of nowness.
Photos: Phuong, Nhi, Duc
Serela – the shelter of inspiration
Karlsruhe, Germany
06.03.2021
Serela – the shelter of inspiration
Karlsruhe, Germany
06.03.2021
Words: Phuong
The dorm room of my ongoing philosophical thoughts
Karlsruhe, Germany
14.03.2021
